Monsters and Critics columnist Liz Lengthy recaps The Actual Housewives of Beverly Hills, Season 12, Episode 2, Receipt Offender, with somewhat assist from a glass of Rose (or two) …
Whats up, my Housewives-Lovers, and welcome to your Pink Wine Recap of those nutty Housewives!
On tonight’s menu are receipts … Elton John charity occasion dinner receipts, that’s.
So no time to waste .. we’ve a brand new Housewife to satisfy, and Sutton ain’t gettin’ any youthful. She is 50, in any case.
So bust out these readers … pour a glass of champs … and let’s toast to Cartier rings that make you appear like Liberace (I’m lookin’ at you, Diana)!
Lisa Rinna is gonna get a storyline – Sutton be damned
So now that Lisa Rinna’s daughter and Scott “The Lord” Disick have damaged up since final season, good ol’ Rinna has to hold her hat on SOMETHING.
And what could possibly be higher than the contrived “I didn’t like what Sutton mentioned on WWHL” drama.
When you recall, Sutton ran her mouth to Andy, saying that she invited Lisa and Harry to an Elton John charity occasion and didn’t obtain a thanks.
Effectively, did Sutton really purchase a desk?? The plot thickens …
However earlier than we get into all of THAT, because it was the primary focus of tonight’s episode, let’s first examine in with Dorit, who chats with PK about how really fortunate they’re. The robbers solely took 50 or so purses and PK’s $60,000 watch, however that’s nothing (apparently).
The extra vital factor is that they’re secure (really, I imply that) and have a compassionate pal in Rinna — who was variety sufficient to supply to cancel Harry’s celebration within the wake of the theft.
And lookie there. right here she comes now, struttin’ down the road in her finest scorching neon inexperienced mini, decided to increase this Elton storyline previous Episode 1 be damned! (I’m givin’ ya till subsequent week, Rinna, and that’s it!)
Meet the brand new Housewive, Diana Jenkins!
As a lot as I’d love to speak extra about Rinna, we’ve received extra vital issues on the desk. And it comes within the type of one new Housewife who just isn’t afraid to point out off her “Nouveau Richness.”
It’s DIANA JENKINS!
Crystal says she’s a pal of Lisa’s and a “firecracker,” so “prepare.”
You’ll be able to’t put your finger on her accent, however she’s apparently an “it woman” and leads a “huge rich life.”
The truth that Soiled Diana casually talked about being with “Kim” throughout her Paris theft is nice sufficient for me.
Enjoyable Truth: Diana’s new husband, Asher, is 33 years outdated, Diana 15 years his senior, so that you do the maths. And as Sutton amusingly famous, “Asher is sort of dashing – he needs to be known as Dasher.”
Sutton reveals the receipts!
And although Diana is “nouveau riche” together with her 10 gigantic Cartier rings, she is stylish sufficient to maintain these girls in examine.
You see, the “girls” wish to begin speaking about charity dinners and whether or not Sutton really paid for the desk that Lisa was purported to have sat at.
And on cue, Sutton pulls out the receipt (with somewhat prompting assist from her pal, Garcelle) to point out Lisa that she paid for a spot at her desk for each Lisa and Harry.
Diana says, come on, girls, this isn’t the best way … and since Lisa realized she was preventing a shedding battle right here, she was all, “yeah, let’s not do that.” (Come on, Rinna!)
It doesn’t matter anyway as a result of not solely did Sutton apologize for what she mentioned on WWHL, however she and Rinna are ready to each be faux good, say they adore one another, and hug it out.
We will’t say the identical, although, about Sutton and Erika, who battle like a bunch of grade-schoolers (shut the eff up – NO, YOU shut the eff up.)
Moooooooo?!?! Have you ever received any of the great things?
In order that about does it! Oh, besides that when Kyle confronts Sutton about her lack of empathy for Dorit, Sutton primarily “doubles down” and talks about how she has been affected by weapons and robbers.
Is that this what makes her a receipt offender? I don’t know. However what I do know is that the phrases “Elton John” finest not come out of Rinna’s mouth subsequent episode, or there can be h**l to pay … as in, I’ll sick considered one of Erika’s mean-muggin’ appears on her.
So who’s the Diamond Award winner of the night time??
Effectively, as a lot as I’d like to offer it to Sir Elton John himself, I’m giving it to none apart from ….. DRUMROLL PLEASE …….
Kyle will get this week’s crown for her confessional humor! I imply, everyone knows she’s carried out some fairly nice impressions up to now, however her calling Diana Jenkins a personality witness as a result of Diana is the sponsor of the Elton John occasion ….
Effectively, simply Bravo, Kyle. Bravo.
Alright, my Lovers! We are going to see you subsequent week! Within the meantime, I’m going to both attempt to meet a person at Victoria’s Secret get together as a result of it did the trick for our new woman Diana or discover me a kind of pancake crepe cake thingies.
I’ll take the latter.
The Actual Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on Bravo.